Zamana Kharab Hai
I want to share something from my recent experience. There’s a woman I know who just turned 30 and works as a doctor at AIIMS Delhi. She’s a senior resident in the OBS and gynae department. Since this is more about sharing that experience than detailing her achievements, I’ll keep it brief on that front.
Regardless of what a woman accomplishes, she often doubts herself due to societal pressures that prioritize men. In this society, women themselves undervalue their own feelings, viewing themselves as inferior and, even worse, belittling other women in the process. It’s ironic that such bias exists in a society where women wield considerable influence
Men are rarely challenged or judged in comparison to women. Society predominantly targets women, constantly subjecting them to scrutiny and judgment at every turn. What’s particularly troubling is that this societal bias is perpetuated by women themselves. Yes, you read that correctly — women are often the enforcers of these standards, that you’ll soon realize while reading my blog.
I agree with the saying, “Women’s biggest enemy is women herself.”
Recently, this woman was preparing for her wedding, but things didn’t go as planned, and they called it off. I won’t delve into the reasons here, but I want to discuss the aftermath.
I’m concerned about how situations like these can demotivate and lower a woman’s self-esteem. Why do they worry so much about their age, appearance, height, and skin color? Men rarely face such scrutiny. They can be overweight, short, or have darker skin without the same societal judgment that women face.
No matter how much a woman achieves, her accomplishments often take a backseat to everything else. In a society dominated by women, hurdles are continually created for other women striving to succeed. History itself testifies to these events.
If all of this seems unreasonable, then why does a successful doctor with numerous degrees and a thriving professional career at a prestigious hospital still harbor doubts about herself personally? Why does she continue to belittle herself because of her age, even when her family reassures her that age is merely a number? I also know another girl who faced significant challenges due to her weight, and another girl who excelled in appearance, academics, and every aspect, yet struggled because her family couldn’t afford dowry.
Do you all worry… I worry… And it’s not limited to just marriage. It’s also about maintaining a strong professional stance. I’ve experienced working in an organization where working mothers were terminated because they weren’t perceived as productive as working fathers. There was a biased perception that they didn’t exhibit the right attitude towards work and the organization. Additionally, men consistently received better appraisals than women in that environment.
It’s not just India, but all over the world. A client of mine harassed me, accusing me of not knowing something related to work. I believe if I were a man, he wouldn’t have treated me the way he did. Why are things so different for women compared to men? Why is it always so challenging for a woman? I’m not saying there hasn’t been progress; there certainly has been. Yet, it’s still not easy being a woman.
